Just Your Stereotypical Kissing Game Story
by ShortLeggedGiraffe
Summary: all the fun and sexiness of other fanfics about games such as truth or dare, spin the bottle, and strip poker, along with all of thier cliches, all thrown together into one story with a plot, for the most part...Chapter 3 up!
1. The Invitation

**Disclaimer:** I don't own anyone in this story except myself… wait! Do I own myself? eek! Hold on, I'm not even in the story…sorry for wasting the three seconds of your life that it took to read this disclaimer…

**As the title says, this is just your stereotypical "kissing game" story. By that I mean this: I am poking fun (whilst not trying to offend anyone) at any/all fanfics about "truth or dare," "spin the bottle," "strip poker/strip pool" …and any other games of that kind… this story is also making fun of myself (because I like to read/write them) and other clichés and what-not. Any who, this is not to be taken seriously, for it is just for kicks and giggles. Now that you understand my motives…**

**Enjoy!**

**Chapter one**

**The Invitation**

It was morning. Draco awoke to streaming sunlight pouring through his window.

"Shit, bitch, it sure is bright outside," He yawned offensively, as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. The non-descript girl in his bed answered with a nod, and slowly crept over to the door to put on her non-descript clothes that had been torn off from the previous night's conquests (yes, there was more than one. He is just that studly).

Draco stood up, completely naked, naturally, and went into the bathroom for a shower. The girl (who the author will now describe) was short and thin with long, brown hair which was slightly bushy (you may _think_ you know where the author's going with this…). The now descriptive girl picked up her clothes and put them on before tip-toeing out of the boys' dormitory to her own.

Draco came back from his shower, not bothering to cover up his sexy sexiness with a towel, and was disappointed to see that the now-descriptive girl had gone.

"Damn," he muttered to himself, "I was hoping for another round before breakfast."

Draco strolled into breakfast, fashionably late, of course, and winked at several passing girls who shrieked and then fainted, naturally.

Hermione caught sight of him from across the room and her face went briefly pink.

"SO, how was your night last night, Hermione?" Harry asked nonchalantly.

"Eek! Erm, er, um, uh, hmm, well-" Hermione uttered, now running out of stalling words. "It was just dandy, you?" She replied "_Whew! That was a close one,_" She thought, out loud.

"Um, Hermione, we can totally hear you." Harry said staring at her for the maniac that she had just proved herself to be. Ron nodded, not really paying attention. "And I asked _what_ you did, not _how_ you did it," Harry continued.

"_How_ I did what? I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about!" Hermione blushed 99.9 scarlet at this. _"How could they know about what I did last night? He promised he wouldn't tell anyone!"_ Hermione thought, out loud, yet again.

"Hermione, we can still hear you…Anyways, returning to my question from before, because this story really needs to be getting somewhere fast, what did you do last night?" Harry asked getting a little agitated.

"I told you, I didn't do anyone- I mean anything! Why do you ask?" Hermione said, twitching… because, after all, three Starbucks® double-shot espressos plus four red bulls equals serious twitching.

"Oh, no reason," Harry winked unnecessarily. "I was just wondering because you and Malfoy looked pretty cozy last night at Pansy's super-hella awesome party, last night." Harry winked again, now twitching a little himself… because, after all, three Starbucks® double-shot espressos plus four red bulls equals serious twitching… but I'm sure you already knew that.

**_The night before- Pansy's super-hella awesome party_**

"Damn, Hermione, you sure are looking pretty cozy with Malfoy!" Harry yelled over the music and the crowd.

**_Right now- at Breakfast_**

"Yeah, I know I was," Hermione responded to what Harry said right before we delved into that little flashback. "But nothing happened." She blushed again, but this time only about 99.3 scarlet.

"I see," Harry muttered skeptically. "Well, thank God, because you getting jiggy with Malfoy wouldn't make any sense at all, seeing as you two are sworn enemies." Harry's voice suddenly went really intense and low, "_or are you?_"

Hermione nodded, not really listening anymore… she had drifted into her memory of the day before.

_Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh_ (the noise effect thing whenever someone goes into a flashback)

_Whoosh, whoosh_…

_**The day before- The Common Room**_

Dean burst through the portal hole (the author regrets to inform the reader that she has forgotten the official name for the picture frame entrance to the Gryffindor common room, and will have to call it the "portal hole" for now… if "portal hole" is, in fact, the real name, then forget you ever read this message), holding a small piece of parchment.

"Hey everyone! Come look!" Dean screamed, excited about what was on the paper, but was more excited that for once he was the center of a story's attention, even if only briefly.

"What is it, Dean?" Harry asked from the nearest squishy armchair, a little perturbed at Dean's sudden center of attention-ness.

"Pansy just gave me this! It says here that there's a party tonight, and everyone's invited!" Dean shrieked excitedly, louder than most of the infamously shrieky girls (i.e. Lavender, Parvati…etc.)

"What kind of party?" Ron asked skeptically, snatching the invitation from Dean's oh-so-excited grip. The invitation read:

_I am throwing a super-hella awesome party tonight!_

_Everyone's invited!_

"Can even _I_ go?" Hermione asked, peering over Ron shoulder at the slip of parchment.

_And yes, even the Mudblood can go!_

Ron chuckled, "This super- hella awesome party she's throwing for everyone sounds like a cheap ploy to make herself popular."

_And no, this super-hella awesome party I'm throwing for everyone is **not **a cheap ploy to make myself popular! _

_Or is it?_

_Mwahaha!_

_Be at the Slytherin Common Room 8!_

Lavender looked at Parvati and they both squealed simultaneously, "A party? OMG! I am so EXCITED!"

"NA-UH!" Dean squealed over them, "No WAY you're as excited as me!" They all started jumping and screaming in a deafeningly screechy circle… well actually it would be a deafeningly screechy _triangle_, since there are three- back to the story.

Hermione rolled her eyes.

"What?" Ginny asked, "Are you not going to go?"

Hermione shrugged.

"Are you, or aren't you? Because I don't think I want to go if you're not going."

Hermione shrugged again.

"So…yes? No? What is it then?"

Hermione made an indistinguishable facial expression and then grunted.

"Damn it, Hermione! Use your words!"

"I _guess_ I'll go," Hermione said with another twitch...because, after all, three Starbucks® double-shot espressos plus- we've been through this already.

Ginny squealed gleefully.

"Squeal again, and I won't go," Hermione warned with another twitch… because, after all- never mind, I won't even start.

Ginny tried to restrain herself from squealing, shrieking, screeching…etc. for the rest of the pleasantly warm Saturday afternoon, until eight o'clock.

She banged on the bathroom door where Hermione was primping.

"Hermione, are you ready _yet_?" Ginny asked exasperatedly.

"I will be out in a minute or two, stop banging the door!"

Ginny blushed and peeled herself off of the wood (hehe).

Hermione stepped out of the bathroom.

Ginny squealed loudly with excitement.

"Damn it, Ginny."

**HEY! If you like this story, you should definitely check out my other story entitled "Some Call It Stalking, I Call It Love," and maybe even leave a review? **

**And now, this is where you click the button that says "Go" (Please review!)**


	2. The Truth and the Dares

**Thank you so much for the reviews!**

**Woohoo! Chapter 2! (that rhymed)**

**Chapter two**

**The Truth and the Dares**

Hermione and Ginny made their way from their dormitories to the common room where they met Ron and Harry. The foursome merrily skipped to the Slytherin common room.

They stopped at the spot that where the Slytherin house was alleged to be.

"I guess this is the entrance to the Slytherin common room, but I'm not really sure," Ginny said uncertainly as she walked up to an enormous green neon sign reading: _Slytherin Common Room_

"It can't hurt to try," Ron responded, and gingerly poked at a picture positioned under the sign.

The picture swung open without even asking for a password, and the four walked in.

The picture promptly slammed shut behind them, and they were instantly engulfed by loud music and bright, colorful strobe lights. It wasn't a super-hella awesome party… it was a super-hella awesome RAVE.

Hermione, already feeling a little fish out of water-ish sat down on a couch. Ginny, on the other hand was dance and shaking her groove thang all over the place. Hermione sat on the couch and whistled, being the innocent little Hermione we all know and love. She was interrupted, however, in the third verse of "Killing me Softly," by some kind of screechy, high pitched shrieking.

"What the hell is that _noise_?" Hermione asked loudly, covering her ears with her hands. She turned to find the source of the racket only to see Pansy. _Oh, well that makes sense now_, She thought (to herself, this time.)

"Ok, can I, like, have everyone's attention?" Pansy shrieked.

"Make it stop!" A fourth year Ravenclaw screamed as his ears began to bleed.

Pansy rolled her eyes, but continued, "Um, Hello! Can I have everyone's attention?"

Hermione couldn't take it anymore, "Everyone just shut the fuck up so that she will!" She screamed.

Everything went dead silent, the music cut with a zipping noise, and everyone immediately stopped what they were doing and looked up.

"Ok," Pansy began, "We are going to play a little game."

The crowd groaned simultaneously.

A character not important enough to have a name yelled out, "What kind of game?"

"Well, it's a muggle game called 'Truth or Dare'!" Pansy responded.

Another anonymous person screamed, "That game SUCKS!"

Pansy's bitch side took over without warning, and she shrieked, "Well fine then, you can just leave for all I care!"

The anonymous student shrugged and walked towards the door, "Party back at my common room and everyone can come!"

The mass of people all scrambled out the portal hole (the author regrets to inform the reader that she still has not bothered to look up the real name for the picture frame entrance to the Slytherin/Gryffindor common room, and will still be calling it "portal hole" at this time), and followed the still anonymous person to his or her (that's right, he or she isn't even important enough to get a gender) common room.

The crowd of people conveniently left behind Hermione, Ginny, Harry, Ron, Pansy, and some other less important Slytherins.

I know what you're thinking… where's Draco? It can't be a Draco/Hermione shipper without Draco! That _is_ what you were thinking right? DAMN, I'm good- back to the story.

A tall, blonde girl burst open the door to a closet and ran out with a disgruntled Draco yelling, "Fine! Go to the other party, I don't even care! Your ass wasn't all _that_ great anyway!" He strolled out of the closet very nonchalantly, and sat down in an armchair.

Pansy immediately pounced on him. "Hewo Drakie Wakie! Do you want to come play truth or dare with us?"

Draco made an indistinguishable facial expression and then grunted.

Pansy shrieked excitedly causing the glass on a nearby picture frame to shatter. She scooted her chair over by his.

"Ok, does everyone know how to play?" Pansy screeched.

Everyone nodded because they knew how to play, but mostly they nodded hoping she wouldn't proceed to explain the rules.

They were wrong.

"Ok, this is how it works," She squealed, and proceeded to explain the rules in great screechy high-pitched detail. "Does everyone understand?"

They nodded fervently.

"Are you sure?"

"Just start the fucking game, bitch!" Malfoy yelled offensively (the author has just remembered that Draco is usually referred to as _Malfoy_ in the books).

"Ok," She began, "Draco, truth or dare?"

Knowing that if he picked "dare" she would just make him kiss her, he decided to play it safe and go with "truth."

She sighed disappointedly and asked him, "How many girls have you been with?"

Malfoy giggled a little to himself (he is secure enough in his manhood to giggle). "Um, that may take a while to calculate."

Pansy didn't look at all pleased at this.

"Weasley, truth or dare?" He asked. For some reason, no one found it at all odd that the Slytherins and the Gryffindors were being civil to each other.

"Hmm," Ron made a thinking noise. He liked to live on the wild side every now and then and so he picked "dare."

"Ok, Weasley, your dare is that you have to kiss Pansy." Malfoy looked rather pleased with himself.

"Oh, you've got to be KIDDING me!" Ron exclaimed dramatically.

"A dare's a dare, Weasley, and you have to do it for the plot's sake, anyway." Malfoy explained with his infamous smirk.

Pansy looked surprisingly enthused about having to kiss a Gryffindor that she's supposed to hate in canon. She applied a more-than-necessary amount of lip gloss and puckered up.

A tear made its way down Ron's cheek as he leaned in. She attacked his lips and ferociously jabbed her tongue in and out of his mouth. He pulled away after about five seconds of this and coughed up a hairball.

Hermione was laughing the loudest. Ron, realizing this, took his turn to ask her, "Truth or dare?"

She immediately responded, "Truth."

"You're dare is to-"

"No, Ron, I picked _truth_."

"You have to kiss Malfoy."

"But I picked truth!" Hermione shrieked.

"Are you going to do your dare or not?" Ron asked coolly.

"But- I"

Everyone stared at her. She cracked under the peer pressure, "Oh, alright."

Hermione's bottom lip began to tremble slightly. She slowly leaned in towards Malfoy, who looked at her with amusement. She connected their lips. There were immediate fireworks, and a beautiful rainbow appeared above their heads. Birds started chirping, and a deer took a drink from a nearby stream.

Hermione reluctantly parted from the immaculate kiss. She was feeling things she had never felt before about someone she would never expect to feel these feelings she had never felt before about...

It was Malfoy's turn to ask, "Truth or Dare?"

**Please review!**


	3. The Bad Girl

**At this time I would like to respond to my reviews…**

**imfeelingthis182:** your review made me smile! I like to use sarcasm especially in this story, and I am glad that you liked it!

**Emily: **I'm glad you liked it!

**Ninitademibrooke: **thanks, I'll remember that it's called "portrait hole" from now on…

**homestar-fan: **why _does_ Pansy always end up with Ron? The world shall never know…but I have an interesting spin on the Ron/Pansy scenario, you'll just have to keep reading to find out what it is…mwahahaha!

**dangerz0ne: **the flashback from chapter one continued into chapter 2 and is still going on in chapter 3…yes, it _is_ very long

**ron-o-hollick: **sorry that was boring…but you should know that I did, in fact, put WAY more of "that Draco/Hermione crap" in this chapter just for you! Woohoo!

**And so now that the reviews have been answered…on to Chapter 3!**

**Chapter three **

**The "Bad Girl"**

Since it was his turn, Malfoy weighed his options carefully. (no one, of course, found it odd that this was his second turn asking) He thought it over, _I could either get the hot mudblood to kiss me again, or I could make Potter kiss Pansy, that is, if they pick "dare."…hmm decisions decisions…_ "Ok," he finally decided, "Potter, truth or dare."

Harry thought this over carefully for about 0.054 seconds when he decided to go with "truth" to be on the safe side.

Malfoy rolled his eyes. He couldn't think of a good question to ask so he asked the first thing popped into his head. "Oh alright…um, have you ever kissed a girl?"

Harry looked pretty pleased with himself, "The joke's on you Malfoy! Everyone already knows that I kissed Cho in the fifth book- I mean _year_."

Malfoy looked utterly and completely bored.

"Harry, it's your turn to ask." Ginny said, the author throwing her back into the plot without warning.

"Hmm," Harry made a thinking noise. He smiled mischievously. "Ginny, truth or dare?"

Ginny, in most cliché stories, would pick dare only to have Harry dare her to kiss him. And seeing as this _is_ a cliché story, that's exactly what happened.

Ginny leaned in slowly and closed her eyes; it was all very _teen movie_. But once she reached his lips they both started going at it like rabbits…which may not be the best analogy seeing as rabbits don't usually make out per say. But I think you still get it. Harry had his hand up her skimpy top and she was going for the buckle on his pants. Everyone else eventually pretended like nothing was happening and resumed the game.

"Hermione, why don't you go?" Ron said, ignoring the fact that his little sister was on top of his best friend.

Hermione looked around at everyone. Malfoy had an especially lusty look in his eye when he met her gaze. She couldn't help but want to explore her new found feelings about her supposed sworn enemy. But how? If she dared him to do anything with her, everyone would know...

"Alright," She began, "Malfoy, truth or dare?"

Malfoy thought for a second and decided on "dare."

_Great,_ She thought,_ Now what am I supposed to dare him to do…I should have picked someone else. Think of something quick_. "Um you have to-uh-kiss Potter!" Don't worry…this isn't a slash story, just keep reading.

"_What?_" Malfoy asked, horrified. A guy is only so secure in his manhood.

"I mean- Pansy. You have to kiss Pansy." She wanted to kick herself for making him kiss another girl, especially one as gross and squeaky as her.

Pansy looked positively gleeful. This was probably her life goal. She applied yet more lip gloss and even managed to pop a mint into her mouth.

Malfoy recoiled, and stared at Hermione helplessly. "Can't I just kiss _you_ again?" he pouted. Hermione thought that sounded like a good enough plan. They kissed again and there were more fireworks and birds and flowers, and this time _two_ deer came to drink from a nearby stream.

This time it wasn't only Hermione who felt a connection, _he _was even feeling things he had never felt before about someone he would never expect to feel these feelings he had never felt before about.

They parted at the same time and stared into each other's eyes until everyone else (mostly Pansy) started to feel uncomfortable.

Pansy looked furious, livid, enraged, fuming, teed off, seething, irate, and even hopping mad.

She was so infuriated that she got up and stomped off in a huff. Pansy huffed her way across the Slytherin common room, and then huffed her way out the portrait hole (a big thanks to Ninitademibrookefor the official name of the picture-framed shaped entrance to the Slytherin/Gryffindor common room that the author never bothered to look up)

"Well that takes care of her," Malfoy said rather pleased.

Ron, oddly enough, looked a little sad at her departure. Harry and Ginny didn't seem to notice her absence as they were much to concerned with their own business.

Ron looked at his watch, "Wow, it's late, we should be going."

Hermione was a little disappointed, but then remembered that she was head girl and shared a living space with the sexy head boy.

"That's enough! Break it up, you two!" Ron said as he pulled Ginny off of his best friend. "Gah, get a room," he muttered, and then immediately regretted, as Ginny and Harry ran off together to find an empty classroom.

"Come on, Hermione!" Ron called, "Let's go!"

Hermione reluctantly got up from her place on the couch and followed Ron. She smiled to herself, knowing that she would be seeing Malfoy later that night back at their dormitories.

**_Later that night_**

Hermione was sitting on the couch in the Head's common room, reading. Or at least she pretending to be reading and was really watching the door for when Malfoy would come in. The door creaked open a little, and Malfoy peeked inside. Hermione's heart quickened at the sight of him.

"Oh," He said, spotting her on the couch, "I thought you'd have gone to bed." He smirked mischievously.

Hermione carefully marked her page, and placed the book on the table. "No, I decided I would stay up and read for a little bit." She said letting the strap of her tank top slip down her shoulder ever so slightly. She was now seductive which, of course, was not out of character of all. But it seemed to be working, as he had the same lusty look in his eyes that he did back in the Slytherin common room.

He walked over to the couch, "Can I sit down?"

"Sure," she said, pulling her all-of-a-sudden-straight-and-sexy hair out of her ponytail and letting it fall around her shoulders.

He sat down close to her. "About tonight-" he began.

Hermione put on an innocent face, "What about it?"

"When we kissed…"

"Go on."

"Um, never mind…"

"No, say it." She persisted

"I can't really explain with words," he said, so he just leaned in and kissed her. She kissed back and allowed his warm soft tongue into her mouth.

The author just remembered that Draco Malfoy doesn't kiss gently and lovingly. And so, Malfoy and Hermione fiercely attacked each other in a hot sweaty heat. With Malfoy on top, they continued their tongue wrestling as Draco's hand slowly traveled up Hermione's thigh. Her normal goody-goody self would've stopped him immediately but this is a cliché story in which Hermione is a "bad girl."

None of them even considered stopping and thinking about what they were doing. Draco's hand continued up Hermione's silky, soft leg (she remembered to shave using her Venus® razor so she could feel divinely smooth). His hand neared her _special place_ when she stopped him because she wasn't sure if she was ready, but mostly because she just remembered that it had been a while since she trimmed the hedge.

Hermione smirked a little and pushed him back against cushion. She got down on the floor and unzipped and pulled down his pants revealing his quite excited _special place_. As she went down, Draco kept trying to put his hand on the back of her head, and she kept batting it away.

She lifted her head up, much to his dismay, so he said, "Shall we continue this in my room?" Now normally, at this point, Hermione would claim she was tired and go to her own room, but we've established that Hermione is supposed to be a "bad girl," and so she let Malfoy lead her into his bedroom.

_**The next morning (where the first chapter began)**_

Hermione woke up and looked around at all the green and silver décor. The reason why she was in Malfoy's bedroom came abruptly flooding back to her.

**Please Review!**


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